Monster Mutant Garden Gnomes

From the BBC, June 13 2006:

"Walk into the back garden of Number 45 Lenin Street, [in Germenchik, a village in Kabardino-Balkaria], and you're in for a big surprise.

Towering over the flower beds is a 2.5-metre (8.25ft) statue of Joseph Stalin.

Twenty years ago, Asker Batyrov discovered the figure on wasteland near the village. It lay abandoned and in pieces. He picked up the bits and, with the help of his brother, stuck them back together.

The revamped Stalin was then accorded a place of honour in the corner of Asker's garden, Number 45 Lenin Street (just behind the washing line). It stands there like a monster, mutant garden gnome."

What a fabulous concept ! Monster, mutant garden gnomes!

Ordinary garden gnomes have been done to death, and although the 'kidnapped garden gnome sending postcards home from the vacation spots its kidnappers visited' prank was pretty funny the first time you heard of it years ago, the truth is that garden gnome humor is as dead as...Joseph Stalin. But - Joseph Stalin as an eight-foot tall garden gnome - that is funny!

Keeping to the mass murderer theme seems appropriate somehow, so let us suggest:

- a 10 foot tall Joseph Mengele with greenish skin and slightly pointed ears surreptitiously placed among the tulips in your neighborhood park.

- a 12 foot tall Charlie Manson, festooned with flowers in his hair, peace symbols or possibly giving the peace-sign finger V, wearing robes and with huge hairy hobbit feet, picturesquesly perched among the pines of your local leisure trails.

The possibilities are endless.

If you know of a monster mutant garden gnome in your area, please post the location and a description in the comments.